Monday, November 7, 2011

Sorry

I forgot my rough draft at first so i put it after the final draft so just scroll down and you'll find it.

Rough draft

The world is said to be divided into three parts there's the rich, the middle class, and then the poor. Well this theory is wrong in fact there is one more and we classify those people as less then poor.
These types of groups live in places we call slums which are run down areas with tons of people crowded into small areas like shacks. Slums have a negative impact on human population's because the inhabitants of the slums can get easily sick due to pollution in the air, governments do not always
help these people living in slums so they have to take care of themselves, and there are high rates of
death during natural disasters
due to poor shelter structure and the fact that the structures they live in
are
so close to each other. Slums have the highest rates of pollution making living almost impossible,
people living in slums always have a risk of dying to small fevers or colds.



Life on slums is hard for people because everyone is always getting sick from the things around them. One thing you should note is that slums aren't in the middle of nowhere there right on the outskirts of some major cities. The people in these large cities pretty much use the slums as their personal trash can. This leaves the environment of the slums almost impossible to live in. You can get sick real easily and it’s hard to breathe because the atmosphere is so thick of air pollution. People die to common colds and flu's that people like us blow over in a few days. The government of these countries where slums are located rarely support these places so what goes on in there just goes on unanswered.



 These slums get little to no help by the government so a lot of deaths and crimes in the slums go unanswered. They also get no needed resources from the government like food, clean water, and tools. Their independent because they half to be independent it’s not really choice.  People are dying left and right so much that someone dying is almost expected each day. They know they’re not going to get help so they take things into their own hand. Resources like tools can be used to make structures safer during natural disasters better structure in these slums equals less deaths and less need to repair after.



People that live in these slums are victim to natural disasters full force. They live in small poor structures that fall down easily. Having the structures very close to each other makes it much more dangerous. The ground is not strong so the buildings fall under themselves. The people living in these homes have to choices they either die or they come out severely injured. The sad thing about this is that they really do not get a choice they just sit and hope for the best, not really a choice is it. This is a great example of the government not helping them they all have to rebuild all by themselves.

So you now see what kind of conditions these people are living in. In these places inhabitants can get easily sick due to pollution, governments give little to no help to these people living in slums, and there are high rates of death during natural disasters due to poor shelter structure. This happens everywhere on every slum to every person. It affects everyone that lives there and governments are doing nothing to help them. So what will you do to help them will you sit by and let it go on or will actually do something that can help? Stuff like this does happen and these people need our help.


Sunday, November 6, 2011

Final Draft

Enrique Vargas



Idea College Prep



November 7, 2011



6 A-B



                                                            A Hard Day’s Night


The world is said to be divided into three parts there's the rich, the middle class, and then the poor. Well this theory is wrong in fact there is one more and we classify those people as less then poor.
These types of groups live in places we call slums which are run down areas with tons of people crowded into small areas like shacks. Slums have a negative impact on human population's because the inhabitants of the slums can get easily sick due to pollution in the air, governments do not always
help these people living in slums so they have to take care of themselves, and there are high rates of
death during natural disasters
due to poor shelter structure and the fact that the structures they live in
are
so close to each other. Slums have the highest rates of pollution making living almost impossible,
people living in slums always have a risk of dying to small fevers or colds.



Life on slums is hard for people because everyone is always getting sick from the things around them. One thing you should note is that slums aren't in the middle of nowhere there right on the outskirts of some major cities. The people in these large cities pretty much use the slums as their personal trash can. This leaves the environment of the slums almost impossible to live in. You can get sick real easily and it’s hard to breathe because the atmosphere is so thick of air pollution. People die to common colds and flu's that people like us blow over in a few days. The government of these countries where slums are located rarely support these places so what goes on in there just goes on unanswered.



 These slums get little to no help by the government so a lot of deaths and crimes in the slums go unanswered. They also get no needed resources from the government like food, clean water, and tools. Their independent because they half to be independent it’s not really choice.  People are dying left and right so much that someone dying is almost expected each day. They know they’re not going to get help so they take things into their own hand. Resources like tools can be used to make structures safer during natural disasters better structure in these slums equals less deaths and less need to repair after.



People that live in these slums are victim to natural disasters full force. They live in small poor structures that fall down easily. Having the structures very close to each other makes it much more dangerous. The ground is not strong so the buildings fall under themselves. The people living in these homes have to choices they either die or they come out severely injured. The sad thing about this is that they really do not get a choice they just sit and hope for the best, not really a choice is it. This is a great example of the government not helping them they all have to rebuild all by themselves.



            So you now see what kind of conditions these people are living in. In these places inhabitants can get easily sick due to pollution, governments give little to no help to these people living in slums, and there are high rates of death during natural disasters due to poor shelter structure. This happens everywhere on every slum to every person. It affects everyone that lives there and governments are doing nothing to help them. So what will you do to help them will you sit by and let it go on or will actually do something that can help? Stuff like this does happen and these people need our help. Don’t just because your one person you can make a difference like Steve Jobs said “The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones that do”.







                                                                       Works Cited

             Blythe, Nils. “Mumbai’s slum life poses world problem”.  26 Feb,2008 29 Sept,2011


            Eaves, Elisabeth. “Two Billion Slum Dwellers”. 6 Nov, 2006 29. Sept, 2011 http://forbes.com/2007/06/11/third-world-slums-biz-cx-2/cites -ee-0611slums.html.

           Fink, Sheri.  “Cities of the poor1: life in the slums(Kenya)”.  18 Dec, 2006 29 Sept, 2011http://www.the world of g/node/6669.

          “Urbanization”. 2011 29 Sept.2011 <http://worldgeography abc-chio.com/Search/display/1095691? Terms=slums>                                                                                                                                                                              





                                                                                                                                  

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Intro paragraph


    The world is said to be divided into three parts there's the rich, the middle class, and then the poor.

Well this theory is wrong in fact there is one more and we classify those people as less then poor.

These type of groups live in places we call slums which are run down areas with tons of people

crowded into small areas like shacks. Slums have a negative impact on human population's because

the inhabitants of the slums can get easily sick due to pollution in the air, governments do not always

help these people living in slums so they have tho take car of them selves, and there are high rates of

death during natural disasters due to poor shelter structure and the fact that the structures they live in are

so close tho each other. Slums have the highest rates of pollution making living almost impossible, people

living in slums always have a risk of dying to small fevers or colds. 

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Outline Part 5

 V. Conclusion

 A.Hook:So you now see what kind of conditions these people are living in.

 B.Restate thesis:In the places inhabitants can get easily sick due to pollution, governments give little to no help to these people living in slums, and there are high rates of death during natural disasters due to poor shelter structure.

C.Summarize arguments:This happens everywhere on every slum to everyperson. It effects eveyone that lives there and people are doing nothing to help them. So what will you do to help them will you sit by and let it go on or will actually do something that can help?

D.Leave the reader with something to think about: Stuff like this does happen and thes people need are help. 

Outline Part 4

IV.Defendable Point#3

A.Main Idea[Topic Sentence]:  People that live in these slums are victim to natural disasters full force.

B.Supporting evidence:They live in small poor structures that fall down easily.

C.Explanation:There very close to each other to making it more dangerous. The ground is not strong so the buildings fall under it self. The people living in these homes have to choices they either die or they come out severely injured. The sad thing about this is that they really do not get a choice they just sit and hope for the best.

D. Transition sentence to conclusion paragraph:This is a great example of the govenment not helping them the all have to rebuild all by them selves.

Outline Part 3

III.Defendable Point#3

 A.Main Idea[Topic sentence]: These slums get little to no help by the government so a lot of deaths and crimes in the slums go unanswered.

B.Supporting evidence: They also get no needed resources like food, clean water, and tools to make structures better.

C.Expanation:People are dying left and right so much that people dying doesn't really effect people as much. They know there not gonna get help so they take things into their own hand.

D.Transition sentence to next paragraph:Their independent because they half to be independent.